After paying rent and bills and things I couldn’t afford presents this year. I’d been making her something but couldn’t buy gifts for my family or anyone. She gave me money on Friday morning and told me to go out and get presents for my family. She made christmas happen, and I never got the chance to show her what I got them with her help, or to properly thank her. She was the sweetest person.
She always encouraged me to be more confident and outgoing. To do more artsy things, and to accept compliments when they were given isntead of deflecting or denying them.
I remember one time, during the summer, everyone was sitting out on Lincoln’s Inn Field. I was having a bad day and wanted to go home early, and when a wasp buzzed me I was like “nope, that’s the last thing, I’m leaving now in a huff.” I got maybe five minutes down the road before I realised I wanted to stay and live up to her expectations, and went back for her sake and enjoyed the rest of the day.
I would not have done that otherwise. I would have gone home and been sad, but because of her I had a wonderful day.
She always worried that she was bringing me down, that her problems were hurting me, but she really didn’t. I was glad every moment I knew her. She made all the things brighter, and I wish she’d been able to see just how much better life was for having her in it.
